Tango originated under special circumstances, at a time where women were rarely available. Men danced with and learned from each other. They learned to follow first , then to lead. Learning and practicing in an all masculine environment, a possible source for conflicts between genders were not given. Is learning Tango suitable for couples ? How to master the challenges?
Women actually did not learn. Men had to become very experienced to lead a women well and to impress her, that they could enjoy romantic moments together. Women’s part was to follow well, to look gracious and beautiful. With experience women were able to add on their little adornaments here and there. Women just could enjoy their feminine role to the fullest. Female competition was small. Women had many dancers to chose of and would only dance with good dancers. Heavenly times indeed.
Over the decades circumstances changed
Today there are tango schools, classes , workshops where men and women learn together. Emancipation took a huge influence as well. Sometimes problems appear between genders, which reduces the fun of learning tango.
Looking even further into details, couples have even a more fragile position in learning tango. Do they find those romantic moments they are looking for?
Couples looking for romantic moments
The best and easiest to do is to learn Tango as a single person. You have the individual opportunity to chose or switch dance partners, if you find out the chemistry is not the best or the level is not matching.
You can go to Milonga and practice and enjoy the dance with whom you like, without having private discussions or even conflicts with a jealous partner.
It seems that learning tango together with your spouse might not be the best idea to do in some cases.
Sometimes obsticles are in the way for couples looking for romantic moments.
But yes… of course, tango learning is suitable for couples as well if you take it as a challenge.
Tango brings the best and the worst out of a person’s character
Tango is an amplifier and as such Tango learning as a couple serves as a test for your relationship.
If your relationship is a good one, nothing can break it, not even tango. Couples looking for romantic moments will be just fine with the right attitude, from the beginning. Tango will amplify your happiness and your connection.
If your relationship is challenging …Tango will add on problems.
A relationship based on problems will brake up by one day anyway, with Tango you might shortcut some unhappy years..
Shall you survive the tango courses with brave …you are good for the long go.
I would even suggest to anyone who wants to marry.. take a tango course before you make the decision…
I have seen ugly situations, sad situations, struggle , resignation…happy moments, supportive and whitty moments, fun, exitement, jealousy, envy , everthing.
Tango is just life, master the challenge
And like in life it is up to you how you handle it. Most couples usually come with a weird illusion about what tango is, or what tango will do for them.
Usually they think to enjoy romantic moments with their partner ( those things they hv seen on TV )
I do not want to ruin any desires but what can be seen on TV are prepared shows of professional dancers.
I believe Tango can be a great resource for couples as well, a great common hobby to enjoy until high age, a healthy lifestyle and workout without gym and running tracks, beautiful moments to share in your free time.
Not to disappoint couples from the very first moment, it is still nesessary to condition people’s mind regarding their expectations.
Is learning Tango suitable for couples?
5 Challenges for couples
- Tango is a body language and as any other language it needs regular practice , repetition and patience.
- The role of the men is much more challenging than the follower role. I suggest more patience for women and please do not try to correct or explain. This is a kill for any desire to learn tango for the leader.
- The follower better understand her role to be a “dummy” for the partner and shall not expect romantic moments to happen from the beginning. The first 6 months are the heardest to overcome for a couple.
- It is as well advisable to learn in seperate courses ( not together ) and practice with different partners. This lessens the pressure on the own partner. And it is fun to exchange results and experiences later together.
- In many cases talent, body conditioning, coordination, etc can be very different in both partners. Furthermore these differences can lead to jealousy, envy, frustration, anger. Rather than “teach” or dominante the weaker partner, keep attention to him/her. Use your advantage to inspire and motivate him/her. Instead of resignation not being good enough, the weaker partner just accept the facts and see the situation positive, as a “lucky draw”to have an outstanding partner . In any case it needs this “unconditional understanding” for for each other without developing negative feelings.
Mastering the 5 points you are undoubtly made for each other and ready for the big enjoyment, tango. Good luck !
